Monday, August 11, 2008

The Garmin Lady

Now that I have my inherited Garmin gps system in my car, I am getting to know the Garmin Lady--that disembodied female voice that instructs me on how to reach my destinations. She seems competent, but I'm not sure I like her.

For one thing, when I go a different way than she tells me to,(at the beginning of trips, close to home where I know what I'm doing, dammit), she always says "RECALCULATING . . ." I think she sounds incredibly snotty and ticked off when she says it. Like she's trying to make me feel guilty. I mentioned this to my husband and he said he had noticed this too and was glad it isn't just him.

Also, she seems not to have made any efforts to become multi-culturally sensitive. She mispronounces the Spanish street and place names around here all the time. Like today, I had to turn onto La Verne Avenue and she said it to rhyme with Auburn rather than with Lucerne. In this day and age, that's just inexcusable--don't you think?

Finally, I don't like the way she only gives you little bits of information about the journey at a time rather than laying it all out from the start. I like knowing what's coming more than .7 miles at a time. And don't tell me you're trying to get me to live more in the moment. You're just a control freak, sister.

Are there other voices available? I'm thinking maybe Father Mulcahey.


Jane Ellen+ said...

A friend of mine has on his GPS thingy the voice of John Cleese-- who is also a smug know-it-all, but at least he's amusing. We call him "Nigel."

Presbyterian Gal said...

I was going to say I'd want John Cleese! Who knew he's really there. Now I have to get one.

I would call mine "Basil".

esperanza said...

My favorite is the "make a U turn as soon as possible," which gets repeated. It may be my imagination, but she starts to sound panicked the more times she has to say it. (It's usually out in the country, when "recalculating" is not possible).

Sue said...

I heard you can get them to sound like Yoda.

Left, you turn...

Christy said...

Ok....hear me out.....Tim Gunn from Project Runway.

"Make it work!"

lorna (see throughfaith) said...

lol @ presby gal.

you lot are great :)

ellbee said...

If you google it, you can find all sorts of fun voices - depending on the price you're willing to pay as usual.

We got a "Jeeves" for our TomTom. He's quite lovely and usually patient. Although one can almost hear the sigh that accompanies the "recalculating"